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by Carol Ton
© December 12, 2001
I am a passing shadow
The sun has rose upon me
Warmed me and played with me
I know the sun is only passing
And I shall dance in her glory
Knowing she soon will be gone
And I will fade in the twilight behind her
I came with nothing and I take nothing with me
I came in joy and I go in peace
I like the sun will come again
Until then I leave you with memories and dreams
I did not choose my time among you
But I am thankful for that time
I realize in the sun’s fading light
The memories we have made
And the magic we have created
Time is only a measure
Whether great or small
Time well used is our greatest gift
May those who remain remember time
And time spent among us
May we dare to dream
And follow our hearts
May we know failure
And have the strength to rise again
And bless us with the knowledge
When it is time to rest
For every loss that I have faced
I did not see my opponent
Or perhaps I did and failed to recognize
I lay down my shield and put down my sword
I stand neither triumphant nor afraid
I stand ready
I am tired
And look forward to my rest
I am empty
And have nothing left to offer
So as the sun fades into the west
Remember the last place it touches
When it reaches its end
Say good night to California
And say good-bye to me.
3 Lieu Girls
© March 13, 2002
Mothers Spirit Daughter Grand Daughter
Spirit arms hold tight the brush
Sweet Daughter same same you small girl
Strokes long slow
kiss on precious head after each
Grand Daughter stands walks
2 shadows stroll
Mothers spirit Grand daughter
She feels Grandmothers hand
3 shadows smiles, 3 Lieu girls
WHY CAN'T I
© April 3, 2002
Why can't I leave well enough alone
Why can't I walk away
Pretend I was never involved
Leave them to each other
They deserve one another
It's a lost cause
Give it up
She'll never let go
So why can't I
It isn't my problem
It isn't my business
Why can't I see
That it's killing me not to just walk away
All I'm doing is causing myself pain
I wish I could just forget
But it's too late
THE TRUTH HURTS
© April 3, 2002
I never dreamed
How badly it would hurt
I'd asked her
So many times
And finally I got the truth
By the way she said it I knew
That she wasn't holding back
The absolute truth
Couldn't I just ask one more time
And maybe hear another answer
Roll the dice again
And stay with an answer I liked
But you can't cover the truth with a wish
You can't hide the pain
When you finally know that she meant it
No matter how many times
You ask again and again
And she tells you what you want to hear
You'll always know
Deep in your heart
That she doesn't love you
No matter what she says
She told you once
Once was all it took
And it hurt
© April 3, 2002
Some days I feel so confused
Not sure if I'm coming or going
I can't understand or define my feelings
Like nothing I've ever felt before
I thought I'd heard it all
Seen it all
Done it all
Felt it all
It took my world
And everything I thought I knew for sure
And changed it
I'm not even sure what it's called
I can't put a name to it
Or label it
I'm even sure if I love it or hate it
It scares me
But I can't get enough
It's a constant rush
A burning flame
A cool breeze
All at the same time
It's too much but it's not enough
It consumes me and courses through me
It makes me breathe faster
My heart racing
I can't believe I'm the only one who sees it
My hands shaking and my face flushed
My heart stops
Then starts, racing again
I want to laugh and I want to cry at the same time
My every emotion and thought revolves around it
It makes me look forward to my next breath
I know what it is
© April 3, 2002
I hear his voice
My lips purse
My eyes fill with pain
I feel a protective shield building itself around my heart
Blocking the pain
I'm suddenly quiet
My voice has a chilly edge
I need to go
I can't take this
Why did she do that
Didn't she know it would hurt?
My hands tighten and my muscles flex
I take a deep breath
Emotions rush in from all angles
I try to block it out but his voice is still ringing in my ears
Reminding me of what I can't have
Reminding me of desires unfulfilled
I feel like someone slapped my face
Like someone punched me in the stomach
My eyes fill with hot tears
What a cruel way to say what she isn't feeling
It wasn't his voice that hurt
It was hers
She sounded in love
I'd never heard her that way
I'd never heard that tone
The way she was laughing
The love in her voice
I'd never heard it before
And I knew that I never would
© April 3, 2002
My heart starts racing again
That same old feeling
I ask if she knows what I'm thinking
She says no
I can't believe that
I don't believe that
She just doesn't want me to say it
It's an obligation
To feel what she can't
And break it to me gently
I need to say it
To be certain I haven't let her forget
That my feelings are still clear
I say it to myself
Just to say it
I love how it feels on my lips
I love you
I said it
The silence hurts
My heart feels heavy
I breathe deeply
Try to change the subject
I can tell she's uncomfortable
I hear it in her voice
I know that she'd like to hang up the phone
But it seems like we'd only been talking minutes
I feel guilty
Sorry that I made her uncomfortable
Just to satisfy a need
The conversation never returns to the same comfort level
I feel the tension hanging in the air like steam
I look down
She's being too polite
Talking about the weather
Praying I don't say it again
She must know how it hurts
And I know she hates hurting me
But she won't lie
And say what I want to hear
I'm not sure which is worse
Or knowing she's being dishonest
But I guess I don't have a choice in the matter
by Isabella Seay
© April 10, 2002
Your body is that of a painting with texture.
The palette's knife creating the peaks and lows that
whisper touch me, touch the for-bitten touch.
The street you walk displays you as a gallery hung painting, the
sun's rays back-lighting, the shadows creating the mystery.
I appraise you, why do I? What if your valve falls short?
Put a close to my thoughts, open my eyes be adorant of the textured beauty
for no other reason than she, the painting is exquisite and I the lover of art.
In my adorant gaze I must appraise. I must align with an original, not a copy.
The valve of opinion on others lips create the need for her valve, can
she headline can the painting bring praise from the attending.
I am weak the feel of texture once the curator has turned away.
The guilty devilish selfish need to be dangerous to break a rule.
Does this cloud my judgment, or do you appraise high true?
My taxi comes, I let my taxi leave me to my thoughts
remaining fixed on the painting, on my next move.
Should I be the one to offer the frame to the painting?
Will this painting simply be lost to the memory of a better one?
Alas, this painting she is not of my renaissance but most abstract.
I would be nothing more than a splintered frame for this painting.
A decayed frame unable to hold her in my borders.
Ah, my taxi!
Bon Jour Hotel de Vendome s'il vous plait.
© April 26, 2002
Your lips so soft and sweet,
I quietly touch mine to yours
My hands tremble while explore
Please my love say no more
As you turn I see the curves,
What is this fate!
A gentle grace upon your face
Quicken my heart just a pace
What can this be my mind it soars
Love so elusive; never to be mine,
Now comes to me from a shore
Please my love say no more
Let my arms surround you,
Like no others came before
To keep you safe in my embrace
With this pledge I'll say no more.
Moments of Passion
by Elena Nicole Langdon
© June 26, 2002
I lie in bed and close my eyes.
I feel your tender kiss on my thighs.
As my dream gets deeper
I grasp you in my arms as my knees get weaker.
Your body glistens as the moonlight shines.
I take a finger and run it down your spine
You take your body and glide it against mine
Your mouth moves with soft gentle sighs.
I run my palm down your moistened breasts.
I feel your skin touching mine as our bodies become intertwined.
My fingers caress your body as you caress mine.
I'm kissing your body as I 'm moving down.
And I can feel your juices all around.
As my fingertips slide down your thigh you let out a short quiet sigh.
As I part your legs I move to heavens place.
I glance in your eyes and see the expression on your face.
I see the sparkle in your eyes.
Your fingers running through my hair as you rise you let out louder cries.
I'm lost in lust. I'm lost in passion.
I hear your breath and I know what has happened.
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